Constructive Pain Management

I know, I know. I promised to post here every day for a month. Well guess what? Blogger wouldn't let me in again. Finally made it in after re-booting twice.

September is all about pain. My life is all about constructive pain management.

If I take enough drugs to not hurt, my brain doesn't function. My editors get cranky when I'm not on deadline, so I write through a lot of hurt and then collapse into sleep to get away from it for a few hours.

Having been an insomniac most of my adult life - clearly before the symptoms of OA or FM began to show up - sleep is often what I will myself to do. No matter what medications I take at night, even though I keep sleep apnea at bay with a CPAP machine, pain rouses me from sleep. Or, if I'm in one position too long, I'm awakened because a part of me has gone numb for a short time and is then hurting. Or a muscle has decided to cramp - usually in my feet. It doesn't really matter, because Fibromyalgia keeps us tired no matter how much sleep we get.

My job this week is to not only get my story in on time, but to get my office cleaned up and organized. Then it will be almost time for the Muse online writer's conference where I'll be a presenter this year - and I'll have another story due for the construction magazine I've been fortunate to write for for the past three years.

In between, we'll have out of town relatives here for a day or so. And son will probably roll through with his trainee in tow. (Son is an owner-operator trucker who trains new drivers over the road.) Or, one of his previous trainees will roll through because he has come to think of our place as the best bed and breakfast in the continental U.S. (They're really easy to please when they're tired, dirty, hungry, and in need of a laundry room that doesn't cost them $5 a load.)

I really wouldn't have it any other way. If there wasn't so much physical pain in my life, and if chronic fatigue wasn't ever-present, I'd still be exhausting myself climbing the corporate ladder. And then I wouldn't have time to stress over all the other "stuff". Besides, I'd be too tired, anyway.